In his 2022 Netflix special The King’s Jester, comedian Hasan Minhaj has confessed that pursuing social media influence has become a toxic presence in his life. Of course, that was before Elon Musk took over Twitter.
Now, as a guest host of The daily show On Wednesday night, the longtime Twitter critic decided to put his money where it belongs and quit the platform for good during the live taping.
Minhaj began by saying that despite what many Twitter users have said over the past few weeks and months, “Elon didn’t make Twitter terrible, Twitter was terrible for years.” Because of us!” He called the platform “worse than Tinder, and Tinder gives you genital herpes.”
“But as bad as it gets, no one ever leaves!” He continued. After systematically dismantling the various excuses people like to give for staying, Minhaj wondered why anyone should ever tweet. “You share your opinion, argue with people and potentially lose your job!” he said. “It is a platform without dialogue, without grace, without forgiveness. These are just beheadings and ISIS influence.
“I don’t care which side of the aisle you are on,” Minhaj told Twitter’s most prolific users. “Drop the crack pipe and quit Twitter like you said. What happened to the mass exodus when Elon took over?
To anyone who claimed they were scampering off to Twitter alternative Mastodon, he said, “Fucking cowards!” Getting up from his chair, he added: “You’re always bitching about Elon but you won’t stop!” And then, “You don’t care about your values!”
Pacing the stage, he started shouting, “I hate Twitter! I want to go out! Give me back my mind! Free my mind!”
Eventually, he realized he was the “living embodiment” of Twitter, “judging others without changing anything about myself.” With that, he pulled out his phone and said, “Fuck, I’m quitting Twitter. I leave this infernal landscape at this moment!
After clicking the “disable” button for all to see, Minhaj stood on his desk and exclaimed, “I’m free!” By the time of the show, her hundreds of thousands of followers were gone and all that was left was an error message saying “This account does not exist”.
For more, listen to Hasan Minhaj on The Last Laugh Podcast.